(Joke) 10 Reasons why Portland’s SearchFest will be better than Florida’s IM Spring Break

Loren and Ann at Search Engine Journal offered me the opportunity to write a post promoting SearchFest 2009 to their audience (thanks guys).

However, what you might have read there wasn’t the original post. What I originially wrote was quite a bit more silly and though the SEJ folks weren’t upset or offended by it, they asked me to remove all the references where I made wisecracks about all things Florida.

I asked Loren if I could run the original version on my blog and he said “sure” providing I add the following disclaimer:

JOKE. SPOOF. PUN. SATIRE.

Here it is…

It sounds like IM Spring Break will be a great show (and would be a steal at their new lower admission price) and if it weren’t so far away from where I’d live, I would be there. However, I’m definitely going to be at SEMpdx’s SearchFest 2009 which will happen March 10th in Portland Oregon (More Information, Agenda). We know folks have to be selective about the shows they attend, so I wanted to share 10 reasons why you should choose SearchFest instead of IM Spring Break.

1. Portland has the best beer in the world. In Florida, Bud Light is considered a Premium Dark Beer.
2. If there was a competition between West Coast and East Coast search marketers, the West Coast would win.
3. At SearchFest, NDA stands for “Number of Drinks per Attendee”.
4. SearchFest will be held at the Portland Zoo and attendees will be encouraged to tour the facilities as part of their conference attendance.
5. We have great speakers like Tony Adam, Jordan Kasteler and Jeff Quipp. They have great speakers like Tony Adam, Jordan Kasteler and Jeff Quipp (OK, that’s not a reason).
6. There is no…Reason 6.
7. Nobody in Portland gets attacked by stray alligators.
8. Man, it’s hot in Florida. Lots of bugs too.
9. In Portland, you are a short drive from Mount Hood, Mount St. Helens, the Columbia Gorge, the Oregon Wine Country, and the most beautiful Oregon Coast. In Florida, the only scenic beauty is…well, the Everglades is pretty cool.
10. Because SearchFest doesn’t have to end early so not to interfere with the regularly scheduled Hotel Bingo Night.

SearchFest Featured Speakers Include.
• Danny Sullivan, Search Engine Land
• Rand Fishkin, SEOmoz
• Vanessa Fox, Nine by Blue
• Marshall Simmonds, New York Times
• Neil Patel, ACS SEO
• Susan Moskwa, Google
• Laura Lippay, Yahoo
• Matt McGee, Small Business SEM
• Greg Hartnett, Best of the Web

We hope that SEJ readers will consider attending SearchFest and if anybody has questions about our event, please contact me.

Todd Mintz

Todd Mintz knows PPC…knows Social Media…knows SEO…knows Blogging…knows Domaining…and knows them all real well. He runs growth marketing for )and is also a Director & Founding Member of SEMpdx: Portland, Oregon’s Search Engine Marketing Association, and he can be found here on Twitter and Facebook.

3qdigital.com/